Tip of the Month: Lover Dog or a 'Yeah But'?
As a ‘custom care’ dog boarding kennel, I provide well, custom care, which includes one-on-one care, exercise, and interaction at all times of the day, with each dog. I get to meet and interact with many doganalities and it has come to my attention that whether or not we want to give our dog personal hands-on love and attention… not all dogs want or appreciate close touch or interaction. Unfortunately, many such dogs get labelled because of their ‘yeah but’ temperament.
My dog Sally, for instance, she loves to play with a person but when it comes to being pet or touched or loved on, she’s just very aloof and not all that keen – she will gently just slink away if I don’t pay attention to her preference. I have to respect that. When I give her the space she needs, often she’ll quietly reposition herself at my feet or give my hand a light touch of love, bump my leg when we walk or give a big calm sigh as she sleeps beside my office chair. Many elderly dogs are extremely sensitive to touch whether they have thin skin, hot spots, skin tags (usually almost invisible) are arthritic, or just plain body sore from age. Even if your dog has once been a real lover and has over time become grouchy when touched, respect that!
If you can think of times when you were hurting or even had a bad headache, often we don’t want to be messed with while we are physically uncomfortable – we can ask people to give us space or leave us be for the time being, but dogs – all they have is body language. Are you observing your dog’s body language or are you pushing yourself on your dog regardless, without actually understanding if your dog enjoys the touch and interaction? Just like us some dogs are naturally more affectionate than others and, like us, that should be totally okay! In some cases, it may be the way you touch that is too grabby, strong, or too light, like a tickle. Sometimes it’s the place that you touch, whether it’s a dog’s bony head and ears or less sensitive chest, rump, or belly. Many people ‘manslap’ their dogs until one day that dog says “I love you but… I don’t like that!”
So, what are different body language messages for… ‘yeah, I love you…but… I’d prefer you didn’t get that affectionate, that close, or touch me that way?
- Slinking lowering their body
- Tucking tail
- Freeze frame stance (like bracing themselves)
- Dashing away
- Shivering (when they are not cold)
- Laying in a tight ball
- Ears flat
- Showing whites of eyes
- Dropping their head or moving it away from your hand
- Hair up
- Licking lips
- Yawning a lot
- Quiet snarl or baring teeth (better be paying attention now!)
Being human (especially children),we often stay focused on what we consider a loving gesture and don’t pay attention. We continue, not listening to our dog’s objections until they have to make their dislike yet more obvious! Well as you know, then a dog gets labelled, as if there is something wrong with the dog! Let me assure you, it’s not your dog with the problem! We need to look, listen, and respect how each dog wants to both give and accept affection if we want to enjoy a win/win relationship, with all dogs. Cheers to loving your dog the way they want to be loved!
For more dog health and training tips, visit Ask The Trainer. Ask me about dog-owner training today as well!
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